Mitch Hedburg Was Right

Mitch Hedberg once said: "Man, I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just gonna ask 'em where they're goin' an' hook up with'm later..."

Then he died of a drug overdose in New Jersey.

 ...take that as you will.


Dreams are a funny thing. When you're a kid, you dream of becoming something awe-inspiring. Well, at least to you. Lots of people have a philosophy of putting everything they have into achieving their dream while on the other side of the spectrum there are those who condemn the 'follow your dreams' manifesto.

"Dreams don't put food on the table."

"Money won't make you happy."

I've struggled with this notion of being happy for a long time. My generation was part of such a large push for college education. I was made to think, since the 6th grade, that I would fail at life and be almost assuredly miserable if I did not go to college and get a degree. To my school councilors and teachers, it didn't matter WHAT you went to college for or for how long or what school. We just knew we better get our freshly graduated ass cheeks into a college course and soon. Well, for me it seems college remains illusive. And in many respects it might be just as well seeing as I've ska-doodled through so many career choices and possible majors in the time I've been thinking about school. In my heart, I want to be an artist. It almost doesn't matter what kind of artist. I just want to CREATE. But I was always reminded of how risky such a career path was. For every great artist there are thousands of others who didn't make it and not for lack of talent or drive. The Starving Artist is very much an apt stereotype.

Plus, tuition at art colleges is really high.

However, I didn't want a job I didn't like. I had an epiphany later about my art and career choices, something that never occured to me before: no matter what I chose to peruse as a career, I would always be an artist. Neither was relevant to the other. Degrees in art are no less mandatory to being an artist than knowing how the human body works is mandetory to being human. It just IS. And somewhere in my twisted mind I had come up with this notion that if I don't get a JOB as an artist I won't BE an artists. Artists are not like Doctors. No degree required. Passion and a little talent is all you need.     

So I'm going to take the Beatles advice and just let it be...

My art is who I am. So if I decided trucking is the right job for me, I will still continue to draw and paint and write. Worrying about things like my destiny and such won't do anything but give me ulcers and make me miserable through my own self subjugation.

I am my own worst enemy, but I am primed and ready to defend myself from...myself.


Y'know, that sounded a lot better in my head...